Thanks for the support you gave on my last post! Now, we are going to talked about the lies of men that aren’t effective into women. I try to cover a broad range of subjects as a dating mentor and guide, and this subject is no exception. If there’s any area you’d like me to write about just email me at firstname.lastname@example.org.
Admit it: you’ve lied to your girlfriend. Whether it’s a lie about why you’re late for a date or that you’re on the way to meet her when you’ve really just gotten out of bed, or that you are not crushing on the new girl at the office, you’ve probably lied to your girlfriend. Just be careful, this could be one of many things that might lead to her cheating on you.
Lying is an instinctive human act, I believe. We lie to protect ourselves from so many things – from discrimination, from getting hurt, and more commonly to avoid someone’s ire and the confrontation that ensues from it. Because lying is so common and so overused in some areas, there are certain lies that don’t need rocket science or some nerdy lie detectors to figure out what it truly is.
The topic of trust is an important factor in all matters of the heart — and here’s why. Men lie to women. Women lie to men.
From an article of RD.com.
Lies Men Overused!
Here are some great examples of these types of lies, overused by most men, and never ever believed by women. Gentlemen, don’t even bother telling these lies because the ladies just won’t buy it anymore!
Top of the list is the classic; “No, I don’t like her”. If you’ve mentioned her at least once for three consecutive dinners, or have been showing an uncontrollable sparkle in your eye at the mere mention of her name, believe it or believe it we know that you like the woman in question. If you’ve stared at the woman, or at least pretended to just ‘scan’ her physical profile and look away (only to do it again after several minutes), please boy – we know what you’re up to and we know that you like what you’re seeing. And while women don’t really want to hear the opposite of these very words, let me just tell you that your denial is practically futile because we know better.
Have you ever said, “No, we’re not drinking”. Unless your guy buddies are monks or something, it would be clearly impossible to believe that no drinking would happen when you’re out with your guy friends. And we would appreciate more if you just admit to it; denying it and lying about it, on the other hand, would make women really furious.
Another lie they’ll see through is the “My phone was dead/I didn’t hear my phone ring.” Women would rather be told to lay off than to be lied to. If you want to finish the UFC Fight, or focus on your video game – say so. Stop using your phone as an excuse, man up and tell your girlfriend the truth about why you don’t want to be bothered on the phone.
And don’t ever utter the words, “I wasn’t looking at her”. What the female species has lacked in physical strength, she has been endowed in the instinct and intuition department. And trust me, we observe more than you think we do. So if you think your little stare trip to the woman’s cleavage was unnoticed, think again. We girls are so much better than that.
An unusual one but still a lie you’ll get caught out on is the, “I can do this myself”. This is actually adorable. Whether looking for directions, opening a tightly closed jar, or putting up the home alarm system, it’s okay to admit difficulty and maybe even defeat and to just leave the difficult jobs to someone better and someone who can actually do the job. It does not make women love you less if you admit that you needed help on some things – even the simplest and most mundane ones.
So, which lies are you most guilty of using on your ladylove? See also the Sonic Seduction field guide on asking a girl out on a date and also things you should never post on Facebook.
October 16, 2013 Comments Off
Hey there readers,
Approaching women can be a tricky business especially in today’s time and age when even the nicest and best looking guys are capable of assault. One of our many fears when meeting complete strangers in bars or any social setting is the fact that you might cause us harm or worse, turn into an obsessive stalker. But as “Relationship Design” Guru I’m here to help; and not just with my witty posts each week, you can also email me at email@example.com.
But you may also be just a nice guy looking to meet new friends and possibly a girl to pursue if it goes well. If that’s the case, here are some ways to approach women the way we want you to.
How to Approach Women – From A Woman’s Perspective
How to approach a woman. To begin with, “Just Say Hi.” Cheesy and corny pick-up lines doesn’t always work unless you’re Ryan Gosling who can deliver it with a sexy confidence. Most of the time, we just want men who can simply and confidently say hi. Nothing fancy or any special moves needed, just walk over and be forward with your intention. We can hear more about your pick-up lines later after a connection or some kind of chemistry is established.
- Always, “Make Eye Contact.” When you see a girl you like in a bar (or in any setting), make sure to make eye contact before making a move. Women like to pick out their men too, and you’ll know she’s interested if she gazes and locks eye with you even for just a couple of seconds. But don’t ever stare. A 3 to 5 seconds of eye contact is enough to pick her interest and keep her intrigue.
- And just “Be Confident.” This one’s a no-bainer. We want men who approach us to be confident but not cocky, arrogant or a jerk. You need to carry yourself in such a way that you exude a calm and sexy confidence which you can accomplish with the right body language. Do not slouch or move too fast. Instead straighten your back and move slowly and deliberately while putting a nice smile on your space.
- And “Don’t Be Too Close.” Give us enough space and room to exit the scene whenever we want. Remember that you are a stranger and women of today tend to be overly cautious when meeting men. We don’t want to feel cornered and left without any choice so if you really want to score high in approaching women, don’t stand or sit too close and don’t block the exits.
- Next up, try and “Mingle With Her Friends.” It’s so much easier approaching a woman on solo flight but what if she’s with friends? The best move is to talk and mingle with them too. You’ll earn extra points if you go the extra mile by making light conversation and even more points if her friends give a thumbs up for your approach.
- Remember also to “Keep It Real.” As much as your body language and opening lines matter when approaching women, the most important advice is to be yourself. After all, we’re not really looking for the smartest, sexiest or the richest guy in town. You don’t have to try too hard to impress us. Just be yourself on your best days to show your personality and character.
- And finally, “Don’t Take It Personally.” Even last year’s sexiest man alive, Channing Tatum, gets rejected too so you’d have to keep your mind open when approaching women. No matter how charming, confident and good looking you are, not all of us will match your personality so take rejections like a good sport. Who knows what a no might turn into if you take it like a champ.
See this tips for easy approaching a woman.
These are only some of the common ways to approach women according to a woman’s perspective. Some women may want to be approached differently, but the ones listed above are true for majority of the female population. Give them a try and you might be surprised with the results.
October 9, 2013 Comments Off
“Relationship Design” Guru here to cut to the truth about all things dating. Now we all know that women are dramatic. There’s nothing so surprising about it because somehow, women are wired to be that way. And society, especially you men, has also been wired to accept that women are likely to be this way even if you already mastered Sonic Seduction ways (read this Sonic Seduction guide).
But women do not share the same kind of acceptance with uber dramatic members of the male kind. Sure we have gone past the era that ridiculed men who shed tears; but today’s women do not quite like men who start drama. If we wanted drama, we’d just go to our girlfriends or stick to our thoughts and diary entries.
Men who make so much a fuss about the smallest things, starts a fight for no reason, digs too deep into the emotions over issues that could just easily have been ignored – these are things that turn women off faster than a woman catching you picking your nose over dinner. Men that are posting a lot of Things that You Should Never Post on Facebook. The dramatic man has never been too appealing for women of any generation and any age because it could only mean one thing: a lot of fights.
That said, I know by now you are convinced you don’t want to be a drama queen. But how do you know that you’re becoming one? Here are some signs that you are heading that way.
First off, you whine about practically anything that does not go your way. So you failed to catch your bus. You forgot your phone at home. Your girlfriend ordered pork on your vegetarian day. Something happens that is not according to your plans, tastes, or wishes. If you whine and get mad about these things, by all means your highness, please put on your royal crown of drama. And you create a scene and you like it.
So you whine about the small things like a Kardashian, and then worse, you create a scene a la Jersey Shore – I hate to break it to you but you are the biggest drama king in the world. A drama king is not just a drama king – he’s also hungry for attention. And he’ll take every opportunity to look like the antagonist, the poor guy, the victim and he does not stop at anything to show that.
You’re also being a male drama queen if you put too much meaning on the small things. Say your girlfriend bought a red shirt for you even when she absolutely knows that you love, love, love red. Or your girlfriend happened to be supporting the wrong team.
What do you do?
(a) take it lightly and let it pass, or
(b) start doubting her love for you and go on a pity party because you think your girlfriend’s defiance of what makes you [superficially] happy is a sure sign of an impending breakup?
If you answered a, congratulations you’re no drama king. Consider yourself otherwise if your answer is b.
If you find yourself showing any of these sure signs of drama king-ness, you might want to take another look at yourself and rethink things through. Your girlfriend might not exactly be too happy to share the throne with you.
So, are you a “drama king”(See this article to see the meaning)?
If you need help, contact me anytime at firstname.lastname@example.org.
October 8, 2013 Comments Off
In my previous blog post, we’ve discussed what to do when a girl makes a move. But being a “Relationship Design” Guru means I need to write about the negative stuff as well as the positive so to sustain the relationship you’ve got, read the whole article on what posts you should avoid putting on Facebook.
What you should avoid on posting on Facebook.
Everyone is on Facebook. A person’s social existence is hardly ever genuine unless Facebook proves it otherwise; simply said, you only exist when you’re on Facebook. But then again, why not? Facebook makes socializing easier. Apart from being a massive tool for socialization, Facebook has also become everyone’s most reliable open-book diary. When no one’s there to listen or when you just simply feel like letting everyone know how you feel Facebook is always open for your message.
But sometimes, this openness can create rifts in relationships. I’ve seen one too many people posting about their personal (read: too personal) problems on Facebook. From the simplest little hunch that their partner is cheating, to hinting about just having had sex, to outright arguing on the comments box – talking about things that the public should not actually be told of, things that other people would only care so much for as a topic for gossip. You may want to see this article from eHarmony also.
Guide on what you shouldn’t post on Facebook
While more girls who are guilty of posting these things, many men around the web are equally guilty. So, in the perspective of women, what things would women hate to read of in their boyfriend’s Facebook walls? Here are some of them – the things that you, dearest boyfriends, should never post on Facebook in the name of good and healthy relationships:
Never ever post a detailed story of your fight. Ever heard about ‘keeping your dirty laundry from the public’? Your relationship is private and these private details and problems should only be between the two of you. Your Facebook friends could only do so much as like and their unsolicited advice on the comments box could do more harm than good. “Thinking out loud” about your own qualms and doubts about the relationship also fall in this category.
And don’t think about posting photos of you partying on the night you told her that you went to sleep early. Don’t cause yourself to get caught doing some relationship crime. Apart from blowing your cover, you’re going to cause her to go Facebook-hysterical for shamelessly admitting that you lied to her.
Avoid posting photos of other women or status posts admiring other women. Also included here are posts that are openly flirting with other women. Do I even need to elaborate on this?
And this one is self explantory but don’t post non-flattering photos of your girlfriend. Only post photos pre-approved by your girlfriend. Unless you’re a pro photographer, random and candid shots of your girlfriend should stay in your personal files. You may think she’s pretty in every angle but trust me, she doesn’t think the same. So don’t risk her anger.
Finally avoid posting anything sexual. Perhaps the only excuse to do this – for men and women both – is if you work as a professional sex worker or a sex therapist. We, the public, really don’t need to know about your favorite position or favorite time of day to do your girlfriend. Even if you’re a master on how to be an expert flirt with women, your decent girlfriend wouldn’t exactly appreciate it either.
As they say in the real world, if you cannot say nice things, you had better keep your mouth shut. But on Facebook, if you can’t post anything that your girlfriend approves of, you had better lay your hands off the status box unless you want to change your relationship status from ‘In a Relationship’ to ‘Single’.
For questions, email us at email@example.com.
October 7, 2013 Comments Off
What do you do with a wedding invitation?
Owen Wilson and Vince Vaughn have nailed it quite perfectly that weddings are among the most ideal places to meet women. But while I am not encouraging you guys to actually spend your weekends crashing one wedding after another, I am seriously telling you that as a genuinely single guy, you should take every wedding invite as an opportunity to meet awesome women! After all, the bride will always have her whole battalion of female guests that are composed of female cousins, female co-workers, BFF’s, neighbors and what-have-you’s – and a good percentage of them are yes – SINGLE aka AS SINGLE AS YOU ARE.
Enjoy the wedding, Meet a lot of women!
That said, now is the perfect time to change your perception of weddings. Weddings are not just some seriously awful time to be a single person – to be bitter while being surrounded by couples who are head-over-heels in love, this is the right time to learn about picking up women from SIBG.com. This is the perfect time to celebrate your being a singlehood – to explore and meet as many beautifully made-up single women in one place; single women, who by the way, are likely to be carried away by the overflowing romance in the atmosphere. And the last thing you want to do is to waste this perfectly opportune time by being all mopey and grumpy.
Here are some tips on how to meet women at weddings:
Top of the list is to learn how to dance. It’s a wedding – of course there will be dancing. Sure that’s fun and sexy. But there is hardly anything more impressive and more swoon-worthy than a guy who can dance those slow, sexy and sweet dances. Most every girl out there, wearing their nice little dress, would likely want to be swept off their feet the way Prince Charming did Cinderella. So go ahead and channel your inner Prince Charming by knowing your dances. Extra tip: dance with the grandmas and the little girls – it is ALWAYS very, very adorable in the eyes of the ladies. You can also view this article from MarieClaire.com.
Next up, always be confident and happy. Nothing is more attractive than a guy who knows how to be happy in such a social situation. And confidence is always a proven factor of attraction. Combine these two in a wedding and you’ll likely catch the eye of the ladies.
Don’t forget to socialize. This is a social event and there should be no reason for you to sit on one corner. Not only do you not meet them women, you also waste such an opportune time to look like the nicest man around. Move around the social circles and share a laugh! If you’re too shy to do it, start going around with your friends and the people you actually know.
And what will make you really popular? Offer drinks. This is age-old but this might just work the charms for you. It is safe because it makes them ease up and relax, and also, it does not make them self conscious (compared to when they are offered food).
Weddings in themselves are awesome. But they can only get better if you can use this as an opportunity to make your dating life better. Who knows you might end up meeting the woman you are to marry in one of these weddings? Best wishes!
You can also see my previous blog post on a gent’s guide to jewellary.  And if you need anything, just email me anytime firstname.lastname@example.org.
October 2, 2013 Comments Off
As a dating mentor and guru I often write about how to get out there and take the first step to dating a girl, learning how to approach women. This post is from the opposite angle. So a girl is making the first move on you, huh? Some hot guy you are! Not every man gets that kind of attention from women and even in this very advanced day and age, it is still quite a surprise and a rarity to have a woman make the first move.
But what truly measures a guy in this situation is not the fact that he is attractive enough to push a girl to make the first move on him. Instead, it is on how you react to this reverse situation in the most gentlemanly, most attractive, and most admirable way possible.
Basically, there are two ways to react: turned on or turned off. For some men, women who can express themselves in this way are attractive. These men find it a turn on and perceive these women as those who are in control, go getters, and do not wish to be trapped in what society dictates as the role of women in the dating scene.
On the other hand, some if not most men, find this the exact opposite: a turn off. These men find this a thing deviation from social norms and somehow, it makes men feel emasculated and threatened over the power of a girl to go after what – in this case, who – she wants.
There, so we’ve figured out how men react. But still the question remains: what do you do when this happens to you? When the feeling of flattery dies down (seriously, admit it – you felt great about yourself when she came up to you), how do you deal with the woman who put herself out there to let you know how she feels about you?
Well here are some tips. Start off by always showing her that you appreciate the feeling. It is not easy to go against the norm just to express our feelings. She has put herself to so much emotional burden just to let you know how she feels about you so whether you are turned on or off, nicely thank her for having the courage to come up to you. And if you are turned on by her move, assess whether or not you like her enough to go out with her. See, just because she gave you an ego boost does not mean you’d go out with her and send her the wrong message of false hopes.
Although, if you do not like her making a move towards you, try a much nicer approach at rejection. Saying it too bluntly will only make her feel like she was humiliated. If you can’t say it in her face, at least stop with saying thank you. She’ll get the message. Or try following my steps to avoiding a woman or try to use the patented Sonic Seduction disqualification technique.
Whatever you do don’t use this as an excuse/reason to take advantage of her. Of course using it as leverage for your advances is easy. But remember that a true gentleman does not get make an opportunity out of the innocent and the vulnerable to make himself feel good.
So, what are you going to do now?
You can also view an interesting article at eHarmony.
Hope these tips helped you, message me anytime at email@example.com.
October 1, 2013 Comments Off